Exodus 12:1-14 and Psalm 149 | Ezekiel 33:7-11 and Psalm 119:33-40 | Romans 13:8-14 | Matthew 18:15-20
When someone sins against you, what exactly has happened? Have they broken a rule; missed a mark; caused you to stumble; inflicted damage on your life; created a debt that is now owed to you? In Matthew 18, Jesus seems to suggest that sin can be understood in all of these ways.
Matthew 18 talks about sin from three different angles, and each gives us a slightly different picture of what sin does. In verses 6–9, Jesus uses a form of the word skandalízō, which means “to stumble,” “to trip,” or “to cause someone to stumble.” In verse 15 of this week’s text, the word is hamartánō, which means “to miss the mark” or “to stray off course.” Then, in next week’s reading, Peter brings up forgiveness of hamartásai. But Jesus then shifts to the language forgiveness of sins to forgiveness of debt. The servant who has been forgiven an enormous debt turns around and demands repayment from a fellow servant. The word used there is opheílō, a “debt” or “something that is owed.” Interestingly, Matthew uses the same root word (opheílēma) in the Lord’s Prayer: “Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.” This is often prayed as, “Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who have sinned against us.”
Regardless of the kind of sin committed, or who it damaged, it seems that forgiveness is at the heart of how we respond to another person’s sin. However, even though forgiveness is at the heart of the Gospel, it is not as simple as some of the trite platitudes would have us believe. “Forgive and forget”sounds great, but what does that even mean, and how do we do it? There are three things that stand out to me in this text with regards to what how we should respond to someone in the community who has sinned.
First, this is one of the rare occasions when Jesus actually gives us practical steps. It is not often that Jesus actually gives us clear instructions for what to do in a particular situation. So soak it up! Jesus usually gives us confusing answers that often lead to more questions. This text gives us the rare moment when Jesus gives us a literal “how-to.” He is teaching us how a community of people who owe one another love can live together when that love fails.
Second, the fact that Jesus gives such specific instructions demonstrates that the process of forgiveness is not as easy as “forgive and forget.” Rather, if someone sins against you, it is a big deal. Christian forgiveness and reconciliation begins with truth-telling. Someone has missed the mark. Someone has created a debt. Someone has done harm — to themselves and/or others. Ultimately, someone has failed to love. And if that debt is going to be forgiven, it has to be brought into the light. There is great wisdom in the practical nature of how a community brings it to light. If the Christian community is called to speak the truth to the world, we must first be able to speak it to one another.
Finally, what stands out to me most in this text is in verse 17, “…and if the offender refuses to listen even to the church, let such a one be to you as a gentile and a tax collector.” This can sound harsh. These words would have carried real weight for Matthew’s community. Gentiles and tax collectors represented people who stood outside of the boundaries of the religious community. It can sound like Jesus is telling us to try several times and then kick them out. But there is an extraordinary irony in here. The man who recorded these very words of Jesus was himself a tax collector. Matthew knows what it is to occupy that uncomfortable place on the margins. And more importantly, Matthew knows that being called a “tax collector” was not the end of his story. Jesus saw him on the margins, called him, and drew him in.
So whatever Jesus means by “let such a one be to you as a gentile and a tax collector,” it cannot mean that such a person is beyond the reach of God’s love. Matthew himself is evidence of that. The person we regard as an outsider may still be someone Jesus is calling, and so should we. The person that appears to have placed themselves beyond the boundaries of the community is still someone God intends to bring home.
So even when reconciliation fails and a relationship has to be held at a distance, Jesus does not give us permission to stop loving the person. We may not be able to trust them. We may need boundaries. We may have to acknowledge that the relationship has been broken. But we never get to declare another human being beyond the reach of grace. Rather, we treat them as one who still has the capacity to hear and proclaim the Gospel.